Never Ever Mail a Rhino Third Class

How do you mail a 2,600-pound rhinoceros?

As it turns out — and I’m not joking — very VERY carefully.

Two days ago, the Cleveland Metroparks Zoo sent its three-year-old black rhino Zuri cross-country to Portland. The zoo people hope she’ll produce babies with Oregon Zoo rhino Pete.

Anyway, Zuri was shipped via FedEx.

Heck, how ELSE wouldja transport a snorting, horned, plus-sized, armor-plated critter?

The move took some serious planning, though, including nearly a year’s worth of training for Zuri.

For one thing, they hadda get her acclimated to the special crate they were shipping her in — just a little bit every day.

Then they made sure Zuri got used to noises she might hear on the plane.

After all, you don’t EVER want to anger or provoke a rhinoceros on a cargo plane. Messy stuff.

So finally, this past Tuesday, Zuri was sent to Oregon first class, as befits a rhino of her caliber.

Good luck, Zuri!

There’s a point to my telling you this news, by the way. Here it is…

Even though rhinos ambitiously and consistently charge at their goals and challenges — — that doesn’t mean they never plan ahead or plot strategy.

In life, in business, even in traveling across the country, rhinos are among the most strategic thinkers you’ll ever meet.

Plus, they’re great folks to know and hang out with.

“Look for adventure in your life. Seek the unknown. Enjoy the excitement of chasing down a dream. Keep charging!!!” — Scott Alexander

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